THE HEART OF MARY
LIFE AND TIMES OF THE HOLY FAMILY
CHAPTER III: "I AM THE BEGINNING AND THE END"
HISTORY OF GOD, INFINITY AND ETERNITY.
UNCREATION AND CREATION
Origin and Infancy of God
Eternity, Infinity and God were born together. There was no Before and After. Nor were the three members of the Uncreated Trilogy born in the way we humans understand being born.
Does Infinity have a father? What mother shall we give to Eternity? What date of birth shall we put in God’s family book? What age shall we suppose for a Being who is one with Space, Time and Matter? How shall we speak of the age of the universe without referring it to a fragment of the line of God’s existence in Infinity and Eternity? And how high will be the mountain of events created by a Being who lives from eternity?
An uncreated cosmos by homeland, indestructible by nature, intelligent by vocation, born adventurer, irremediable lover of Life and its worlds, his life a perpetual adventure through the incognito seas of the galaxies. With what words could we draw on the canvas of our understanding the image of that Divine Being in constant navigation through the ocean of the galaxies?
What boundaries shall we give to his universe? What properties to his space-time? How many pages would the chronicles of his adventures cover?
There He goes. The stars at his voice turn away, the constellations as they see him go by greet him. The lion of Mercury runs across the plain between fields of planets of all atypical colors, singular, slender, subtle, his Great Spirit reaches him and cries out, “fly, creature, follow me to the ends of the universe”. A galaxy like a lake of caramelized light, with the dawn of Jupiter in the nucleus, encloses in its waters dolphins with infrared glasses jumping from sidereal system to sidereal system; suddenly they see the Great Spirit, He, God, approaching running together with the lion of Mercury, and they rush to chase him through the spaces where the Orto dwells.
With what eyes will God see the colors of a field of energy that with its arms embraces ten thousand constellations? With what hair loose to the wind of the galaxies will He feel the breeze that runs through the infinite spaces? With what hands and feet will His Great Spirit scale the luminous summits of the invisible, parallel, lost, ponent, fugitive universes? How will the time it takes to reach the plain on the other side of the most remote star clusters affect God? In what stellar directions will his heart spread its joys when he finds himself on the other side of the shores of a belt of galaxies? How does his heart react to feel the birth of life in the depths of the sea of submerged constellations?
The pearl of life in its sidereal oyster. A world, another world, a new civilization with its typical singularities, with its own particularities, another challenge of the primordial mud to the creative and destructive fire of all things. He, God, advances through the waves of the cosmic seas discovering new worlds; from star cluster to star cluster he carries the joy of the imperishable adventurer to unknown shores. He opens the wings of his Great Spirit and launches himself at infinite speed across the cosmic plains; he feels the impulse of the wind that travels through the subtle spaces and sometimes he plays with the light to be its rider and it his brilliant steed, sometimes he turns it into a ray that he collects in his quiver from where the luminous arrows shoot out into the snowy sky, embed themselves in the heart of a Nova star and transform it into a Supernova. He has Eternity ahead of him; around him stretches Infinity. That was His world, His universe, His original paradise. It had no beginning, it would have no end. Wherever His Spirit turned the stars and their luminous seas stretched their shores.
How many star systems can be traversed in an eternity? How many pages shall we calculate to the book of His life? How many branches shall we count to the tree of His experience? How many worlds, how many races, how many civilizations did God know before revolutionizing the structure of His world and converting the cosmic reality into His own Creation? What is the volume of His memory? How many memories did His mind store before provoking in that uncreated universe of His the final transformation of which we are the fruit?
Indeed, the Uncreation was the Infancy of God. All that He, God, knew and had been, had always been there. The forms changed, but God, He, did not remember that there had been anything else before. And He did not remember because there had not been. That is to say, before Creation there was the Uncreation, but before the Uncreation there was nothing else. Infinity, Eternity, God, were the members of the Cosmic Trilogy. Everything passed, everything flowed, the life and death of worlds, the birth, disappearance and rebirth of galaxies. It had always been like that, the forms disappeared, but the essence remained. Death reduced to dust all that lived, but from the cosmic dust the phoenix of life was always reborn. The leaves fell from the branches of the Tree of Life when the wind of Death blew, they remained bare, fragile in their nakedness, but in the end the fire of life was reborn in the sap of the universes and was clothed again with more beautiful, splendid and generous fruits. God, how He loved His world! Infinity and Eternity held him spellbound with their Wisdom. They were for Him father and mother; and He was for them the reason why everything remained in constant movement.
How then to enter, where to enter to pass and contemplate the memory of Him who was the reason, the cause, the meaning of the existence of all things? And if we were to compare each universe with the cell of a tree, how to calculate on paper the number of the Tree of Life? Or how to guess the names by which the One was known who remained forever when all things passed away? And how to feel the divine experience of the One who wandered from universe to universe carrying with him the joy of existence to all the worlds where he went?
Where to go, where not to go? What a question! Wherever the wind blows, wherever the light of the dawn of a new universe announces its birth, to the confines on the other side of the Orto, wherever the adventure goes, wherever it has never been before. Because the most beautiful is always to come, because the most beautiful is always what has not yet been seen, go ahead, let the suns celebrate the feast and dance the dance of the magic bees! God flies on the wings of the eagle of the stars, He comes riding on the horse of the distant universes, at a trot He approaches, He alights on the banks of the river of Life, He gives His steed to drink, He looks at the horizon and smiles because on the high peaks of the distant cumulus He has discovered the gleam of a snow star. Nothing stops him. His pulse never loses control. He knows no fear. Nor knows anything but the joy of adventure. He knows neither envy nor evil. He has never been in any war. He did not need to know the truth, because he did not know lies.
Truth was He, God; truth was Infinity, truth was Eternity. Truth was the colors of the rainbow shining under a fierce summer sun. Truth was a flowering field in springtime. Truth was a nascent world under a sun of polished diamonds, three moons orbiting around the mother planet, a swarm of ships departing for a stroll through the galaxy of origin, and then the silence of souls returning to the primordial mud of Life. How not to marvel, how not to laugh, how not to pass by and refuse Life’s invitation to participate in its adventure! He who was uncreated became a character, he allowed himself to be inscribed in the register of the dreamed history and there he let himself be marveled by the creative genius of Wisdom.
This is how He spent His childhood. Such was the childhood of God.
But one day a desire awoke in Him, God, a desire. On that day God had a desire. And that desire bore in its core the whole imprint of the heart in whose breast it was born.
Let us see. Wisdom was His sister; She moved all things through Him, through Him She converted energy into matter and launched it into space illuminating distances with those fireworks at the origin of new universes; then She sowed the seed of life in the new stellar fields and the universes were filled with creatures. At the end of time Life gave way to the waves of Death. And all creatures disappeared from the universe like castles on a beach washed away by the tide. Yes! All without exception disappeared between the fingers of time like water, like desert dust. Such was the fate of all creatures during the Uncreation. It had always been so. Life and Death were part of the uncreated cosmological system. Only by God and for God did the cosmic clay take form; Wisdom breathed the breath of life into the clay of the worlds and became animate beings. But only for a time. In due time Life gave way to Death and its waves dried up that primordial mud from which all creatures had been formed. Dust returned to dust. Ashes to ashes. Only He, God, was indestructible. Then He, God, said to Himself:
Would it not be wonderful if all the creatures of His universe were born to enjoy Immortality? Would it not be great if, returning from His voyages over those remote and uncharted seas, laden His heart with fabulous adventures He should again meet, as one returning home, His beloved friends?
Yes, Immortality for all the creatures of the Universe! This was His dream. Such was His wish. A beautiful desire.
And He had it with such intensity that with awakened eyes God already saw His universe transformed into a paradise inhabited by worlds without number. Peoples of distant galaxies and planets sharing on the table of that Civilization of civilizations the same bread, the achievements and advances of their original societies. A universe full of life and color. Like swarms of little birds roaming the forests in the open sky, like crowds of creatures riding the plains. And He was running, flying with them, opening horizons for them, tracing new routes for them through the stars.
In the dream that inspired His desire, God already saw Himself plunging into the depths of the cosmic ocean in search of new pearls. And Wisdom, His sister, His friend of adventures, leaving Him clues among the stars, marveling Him with a new victory over the divine capacity to be surprised. She would make His dream come true. The daughter of Infinity and Eternity would clothe all the living with immortality.
This was the desire that grew in the heart of God. The question is: could that dream be realized?
Well, as far as He was concerned, He had no doubt about it. His Faith in the Power of Creative Wisdom to overcome the challenge placed on the table, creation of immortal life, His Faith knew no Doubt. However, the question was there, and its implication was no less vast and profound, for what consequences would such a transformation of state provoke in the Cosmic Uncreated System?
Naturally God was beyond the implications and their consequences. His Faith in Creative Wisdom was so blind that at no time did it occur to Him to doubt His Power to effect such a transformation of state. He set to work. Now, where to begin to make his dream come true: through the Immortality of the species as the first stage towards the Immortality of the Individual, for example? Of course he did. Perfect!
What God lived from then on, what God did from that day on, can we imagine it, understand it, recreate it? An extraordinary Being arises in the stars; His purpose is to unite all the worlds that appear and disappear in space and time and to create a Civilization of civilizations that will overcome all the problems that the challenge of Immortality suggested to them. United in a Universal Empire the worlds would extend throughout the galaxies its Civilization. God would be the head of that Cosmic Empire. He would lead the first worlds to meet the last, unite them all, teach them to be free, to enjoy the wonders of the universe. And there would always be more.
God’s experience of encountering worlds of all kinds was put at the service of His dream: “Immortality for all”. He set to work. He opened routes among the stars and doors among the constellations, discovered new worlds and extended over their civilizations His Scepter, He gave to the kingdoms that were being formed Magna Charters. He directed their technological evolutions towards the meeting in the third phase, integrated all the kingdoms thus formed into an Empire and united to His Person the Crown. He in person was integrated into that World of worlds as the King of kings and Lord of lords in whose Word all peoples had their guarantee of growth and peaceful and free coexistence. His Word was the Word, and the Word was God.
And so it was. In time that Universal Empire grew and extended its frontiers to the most remote stars of the uncreated heavens.
How to draw on the canvas of our imagination the properties and nature of that Civilization of civilizations that spread its glory over a sea of infinite stars? What Library on the Origins and History of the Empire into which God had transformed the Uncreation came to be formed in time? With how many Particular Histories was its Universal History composed? What was the number of sciences that the sages of that Empire mastered, recorded, cultivated?
Wisdom, invisible and beautiful, loving and joyful, from her luminous and transparent throne over all her creatures extended her protection and intelligence; and in all things her marvelous soul manifested itself, moving everything with a single purpose: to discover to God the laws that govern the Universe.
This, His universe, was filled with joyful and adventurous worlds with only one concern in life, to enjoy the time of existence that each individual had been given. For, although life was beautiful, magnificent, breathtaking, and the will to live was never ending, the fact was that time was limited and the passage of creatures through the world, ephemeral. Like the spring clouds that cry their last days on their May tomb before the cradle of summer, like the flow of the river that crosses the earth from East to West but approaches the ocean of unquenchable thirst, so was the life of all the beings of that Empire that God had raised with his hands and loved so much. The pain of the last embrace, the loss of the friend who disappeared while you were on a journey, the tear you did not collect from that nightingale that died with the sorrow of not having expired in your arms, oh Lord, the tender murmur of a prince whom you loved with the feeling of a brother and vanished in the mists of his innocence, giving you kisses, blessings and loves for the days you gave him, for having given him the opportunity to know you, for having made his life a story worth living even though his breath was subjected to the law of final silence. Ah, the rustle of the rose when its petals die between the fingers of the storm. The announcement of the end of perfect happiness written in blood on a future without defenses against the arrow that seeks its chest with certainty. It wounds her core, tears her thought, the spear reaches her heart.
One day Death awoke from his lethargy and claimed for himself crown and scepter. I mean, if you are told that the One who claims to be God cannot make His wish come true, then what is your answer?
If you are wise or simply aspire to wisdom you will answer that that divine desire, Immortality for all creatures, this desire implied a structural revolution whose consequences would have to reach God Himself. If you are one of those who always opt for the easy things and choose the option of the ignorant, you will answer that this Being cannot really be God, because for a True God nothing is impossible.
Well, that is what happened. In time God overcame the first phase of His Desire and transformed His universe into an Empire of Worlds with origins in the most diverse stars of the most remote solar systems. He was moving toward the last phase of His project - Immortality for the Individual - when the Doubt was made. I mean, the Worlds had reached Immortality and counted their years by millions that never end, but the individual remained mortal. And this is where the problem was born. As long as the individual was born to die, and Immortality did not enter into the formal structure of his logic, life did not suffer Death. But when the individual knew that the possibility of Immortality existed and discovered that the origin of that possibility was in the King of kings and Lord of lords of that Empire of the stars, the idea of living immortally and having to die irremediably provoked in the mental structure of a part of the living a violent shock.
“For if He is True God, and to a True God nothing can be denied because for Him everything is possible, how is it that by wishing us Immortality we are subject to Death?”, asked the ignorant, for violent ignorant.
This question, so elementally logical, so rationally simple, was the breeding ground where Doubt developed. And Doubt led to the Denial of the existence of God. And in the flesh of that Denial : Death incubated the virus of War.
Not being the King of kings and Lord of lords of the Empire of the stars God in all the theological and existential extension of the word, surely there would be some way to destroy him. The only thing to do was to find the weapon to destroy him.
That Universal War took place before the creation of our Cosmos. That Apocalyptic War had its origin in Doubt, and Doubt led all to Destruction. It was a war that divided all worlds and pitted them against each other to the death. The violent part, the part that denied the existence of God and considered the King of kings dead as soon as they discovered the ultimate weapon, this part chose the fate of the ignorant, loved the madness of the foolish and undertook an evolution on crooked lines in the direction of the transformation of the being into a new species of infernal creature, addicted to Power, in love with War, its will for law, its law beyond good and evil. They discovered the Science of good and evil and took it to its ultimate consequences.
The part that the wise men chose, Faith, the love of Truth, though they could not comprehend it, this part loved God and refused to accept the argument of the materialistic atheism of the violent. They agreed that the argument of the ignorant opened a breach in the Universal Faith in the origin of the Empire of the Worlds, for certainly it could not be understood that Death would not bend his knees before God. And yet who were they? Exactly who were they to understand how this conflict between Life and Death which God had brought about by His desire was affecting the structure of Universal Reality? Of course not, the wise, peaceful for wise, never accepted the legality of the argument on the basis of the scientific atheism of the violent ones. What was hidden behind that irrational denial of the Existence of God but an uncontrollable passion for Power? What the apostles of atheism wanted to lead them to was a universal war, from which, against all wisdom, they hoped to emerge as victors in order to impose a demonic status quo on all. And there was to be no more talk. This was the truth and no matter how much science in twisting arguments the Fathers of Doubt invented, this was the light of truth that shone at the bottom of their systems of thought. What was the difference between Doubt and Madness? Ignorance to understand the nature of the cosmic conflict that in its innocence God had provoked: the Fathers of Doubt by Method dressed it up as science, then made science a new religion, Scientific Atheism, and then declared war on Faith. The latter, because it knew God, and although in its heart it could not understand the nature of the conflict that His desire had provoked in the Uncreation, it knew that that war would be the beginning of the end of all things. This argument of the wise, peaceful for wise, was of no avail to the Warlords.
Doubt was the truth,
Doubt was in them,
they were the Truth.
With such a logical structure, corrupting Logic to the point of twisting it and transforming it into an irrationality typical of demonic beasts, the bad guys answered the good guys.
When God discovered what was happening, His eyes were frozen in their sockets. And they were frozen in their sockets because He did not and could not understand what was going on.
What was War, what was its origin and what was its goal, what were the enemies of His Empire seeking, and what mysterious force dwelt in their rebellious and incorrigible hearts?
Power. The exercise of Power had become the madness of Power. Power drove the wielder mad. Ah, the madness of Power. How was it possible that a creature born to be a wind passing by could dare to raise his voice to God? Was this madness for Power one of the effects of the Science of good and evil?
At first it was like a fire that is born, you put it out and you think the problem is solved. But you turn around and see another fire growing and devouring some other part of your world. You run, you arrive, you put this one out too and again you think it will never happen again, because everyone sees that the end to which everyone who falls into the nets of the Science of good and evil leads is to return to the dust from which it was taken. There is no mercy, no destiny. No tears are enough to extinguish this fire.
The violence in the opposition between Good and Evil grows in the same geometric progression as the fires it creates around it. No sooner do you extinguish one than twice as many are born. You extinguish these and the geometric progression continues. Two fires are born again further on. You run over there, put them out and they come out twice as many in the distance. When you come to realize it, the geometric progression itself has encircled you and you find yourself in Hell. Its flames are devouring everything you have raised with your hands. You oppose, you resist, you declare the final war on your enemies, because you are the enemy, the target that Hell seeks. The worlds are only pawns in a game that escapes you but is as real as the massive destruction of the worlds that were once the pride of your eyes. What have those worlds become? Into dust wandering like aimless nebulae that carry in their entrails all that was left of what you loved one day.
So it was. That Empire of Worlds that had the God of Infinity and Eternity for Founder and King of kings perished in the war of its own apocalypse.
The swiftness with which I have passed through the memory of the forging and destruction of that Empire must not blind the intelligence at the hour of calculation at whose feet I have laid the limits of my thought. What was cannot be changed, only what will be has been placed in our hands, and if it is already difficult to direct the course of what is towards what will be, how dare we dare to penetrate into things that were before the birth of the first galaxy that fills our Cosmos!
The fact was that, with the taste in his mouth of someone who ate a sweet and the cake burst in his stomach, God found himself alone on the ashes of that cemetery that the Science of good and evil had left in its wake.
The tree of the Science of Good and Evil offered God its fruit, and He did not take it. He did not stretch out his hand. He was tempted by Death, and He did not allow himself to be deceived. For nothing in the world was He willing to become a God of gods, all outside the law, all immune to the arm of justice. He would rather be destroyed than see his empire become the Kingdom of Hell.